Pickrell Pirates

Master's class exemplar! Please help out!

2011-07-27T00:00:00.000-07:00

Hey!
Again, I don't know if anyone is still readin this, but I'll just put it out there. I'm taking grad classes to get my Master's degree and I need to come up with an example of a lesson I would do in my class using technology. If you could please help me out with some postings, I would very much appreciate it (and for some reason, I am having trouble posting on my own blog site. Anyway, here's the site. Enjoy!

http://classycommunity.blogspot.com/

BLOGGING!!!

2011-06-17T01:00:00.000-07:00

So... since the emergence of my facebook account, I have not blogged at all. I'm glad to see that others are keeping the course. I'm currently taking a grad school course that is trying to revolutionize school teaching by incorporating technology. I figure blogging is a great way to increase social networking, creative writing, and professional discussion. Anyways... we'll see how things go. And I curious to see if I can keep two things up at once. See ya!

Happy Birthday, Haddi Jo!!!

2010-04-28T10:44:00.000-07:00

Well, we made it! One year down. Whoot! I wanted to make sure that Haddi's first birthday was something awesome. We had spagetti, bubbles, balloons, bounce houses and bub-bub-bub-bub's (I still don't know what that is, but that's what Haddi says). I'm finding that my daughter is quite fearless. She was running about the bounce house with the big kids and getting launched every which way. She also figured out how to crawl out onto the slide on her own and go down head first. She just assumed someone would be there to catch her.

It was a great turn out! The Cooke babies (as Krista calls them) made their wild appearance. Brenan has a huge fan in Haddi. The Spokely's came with Aria beautifully dressed in her party gown. And Carla and Jo-jo galavanted around.

Haddi INSISTED on riding on the scooter train. She actually rode pretty good on her own.

The two one-year-olds having a "ball."

Mmmmm... birthday spagetti!

It's my party, I can be nude if I want to!

Haddy's photo shoot!

2010-02-06T16:49:00.000-08:00

Alright, so I'm realizing I may just very well have one of the cutest children in all the world (spoken like a true parent, right?). But just look at her!

Carla asked if she could do a photo session with Haddy for some advertising. Rick and was very excited, so he coordinated all of her outfits, we grabbed some SUPER huge chai teas from Refiner's Roast and headed out.

I had no idea how much work it was for Mommy and Daddy, but it was great! We had a lot of fun and Haddy did such a great job! I was amazed that she didn't really fuss too much, even though she was getting pretty tired. A lot of pictures were taken, but these are the ones that Carla thought were the best. Yay!

Bible hero Christmas party!

2009-12-18T12:27:00.000-08:00

Today was the last day of school before Christmas break and we were allowed to dress up as "Heroes of the Bible." They kids actually did a really great job (I'm so proud!). Here's some of what occurred:

This was one of my favorites. Douglas was Samson. He always really gets into his characters.

Sarah looking very sweet as Moses' mom. She kept trying to send the baby up the river to Savannah's desk. (Savannah was supposed to be Pharoah's daughter. You can't really see her tiara).

I was Deborah. I held court under "The Tree of Deborah," as you can see. I kind of like it. Maybe I'll keep the tree there, although I think Pastor Mike might start wondering were the it went.

Brian (missing his hat) as the Vizier of Egypt, Joseph, with his mulit-colored T-shirt. He's sporting a nice hot chocolate mustache. Mrs. Henrick treated us to hot chocolate and peppermint ice cream. She's so grand!

EAT SAMSON JERKY! (It'll put hair on your chest!)

The kids opening up presents from their "secret santas." I use the term Santa because we later watched Veggie Tales "Saint Nicholas" which explains where St. Nick came from and how we should give because God first gave to us. It's really good. Check it out.

Sarah parenting classes. Learn to keep your kids afloat.

DAY TWO: Green beans

2009-12-17T12:46:00.000-08:00

Haddy is practicing. Warming up for a new solid: Green beans. Mmmm. Mommy insist on her eating all the gross stuff first before we move on to fruits and... well, the good stuff.

Oh yeah... ug,... I really *cough cough*... love green beans.

How long before I get ice cream? Mommy says it's an adult food-- like McDonald's (whatever that is).

Girls just wanna have lunch.

2009-12-17T12:29:00.001-08:00

At EXACTLY six months I gave Haddy her first taste of solids. It was a rather monumental moment. It was my goal to nurse Haddy for at least 6 months. I pretty much made it. I had to suppliment formula because my time at work affected my ability to produce milk. But, we made it. It was a bittersweet time. I was sad at my lack of ability to produce the nutrition that my daughter needed, especially at flu season. But now that I have not been nursing for over a month, I'm quite relieved to have a bit of my life back.

When we gave her her first meal of rice cereal (mmmm) we knew this was going to be an important moment. It was really quite rediculous. We had the video camera set up and two digital camera's flashing. It was so great. *Sigh*... what a big girl.

What? Why am I wearing a bib? I thought I only wear bibs when I'm spitting up? And why am I sitting in my chair? What's going on?

Um... I think I like it? What is that?!

Mmm! This isn't too bad!

Hey! I can do this myself! Who needs Mommy?

Alright! Eating solids mastered. Time to learn to drive Mommy's car!

Hurray for costumes!

2009-12-17T11:07:00.001-08:00

I absolutely love costumes! I don't think we get to use them enough. And it doesn't help that I work at a school that doesn't acknowledge Halloween, the one day that it's socially acceptable to wear a costume. But, Haddy gets to dress up all the time. Poor dear. She's too little to fight off her bizarre parents.

It all started with Dr. Haddy. She wants to be like Dr. V and Katrina the midwife.

For Harvest festival Haddy was a rather plump, goofy-looking dragon and I was a princess. It was fun.

David (a preschool and Day care attender at CPCS) dressed up as a knight. We quickly tracked him down and asked to get a picture with him. He was a bit shy, but we got our picture. How adorable!

Clover Pass worship team attacked by baby lobster! Quick! Get the garlic butter! My dad hated this outfit, but it still makes me smile a silly little grin.

...And finally, Haddy as a pile of laundry. No, maybe she's being Mary for the nativity. Maybe she's just hiding so that Mommy and Daddy won't dress her up so goofy any more.

Back with avengence!

2009-12-17T10:45:00.000-08:00

Wow... four months. That's a long time since a post. Hmm... well, where to start? Our little munchkin is growing and a little too fast for my liking. In November, Rick and I had the opportunity to go to a worship conference in Seattle. It was amazing! I'll write about that in more detail later. But before we left, Haddy (who had just turned 6 months) was assuming the crawling position, but only managing to scoot backwards. We were only gone for three days. When we got back home, we arrived to a baby that was in full forward crawling motion, standing up in her crib and pulling herself up on furniture. Aaaaahh!!! What happen to the days when I would just lay her on the floor and she would stay there?!

It's a bit stressful, but terribly fun at the same time. Haddy has taken to singing (especially when she's tired). She loves the guitar. Whenever we're at worship practice or in church, she'll put her fussing on hold while the music is going. She's also saying, "ba ba ba...", "Da da da" (Rick was VERY happy about that), and then, only recently, she's saying "Ma ma!" Yay! Granted, she looks at me and says, "Ma ma," only when she wants to get out of her chair or crib, but I'll still take it! What a sweet girl! She's going to be walking her before too long. The dog better get ready to run.

No, this wasn't for Halloween. Rick and I had bought this costume before Haddy was even born and I JUST had to try it on her. Isn't she cute! In a year it will fit just perfect, and then she can run around with our R2-D2 droid saying, "Help me, Obi Wan. You're my only hope."

Haddy enjoying a ride in Aria's car.

Haddy hanging out with her friend, Aria Spokely.

Haddy being fingerprinted at the Blueberry Festival. We figured we'd put her on file now to discourage any nefarious dealings from her in her future. Nah, I have a beatiful handprint plaque hanging up in my house now.

Just on the verge of crawling. Boy! How far we've come!

My Little Sunshine!

2009-07-25T11:28:00.000-07:00

I just adore this picture and just wanted to share it with everyone. I did enter this photo into a "cutest baby" contest. I would post the link for everyone to vote, but it has a lot of spam and just rediculous stuff with it. As much as we could use the prize money, I won't do that to everyone. Just enjoy my little girl's smile. :)

I love reassurances.

2009-07-16T16:21:00.000-07:00

This week I've been working a few hours at the daycare, and it's been a bit difficult for me. Fortunately I've been able to leave Haddy at home with Rick, but I'm not used to babies that are three times the size of my child. Plus, these huge babies seem to hate me. I know it's nothing personal, they just don't know me. But there's something really degrading about having a small child look at you and scream for you not to even touch them. And I didn't even do anything!
But a really nice change from when I worked at the daycare last year is that I have Haddy. I can go home to a baby that loves me. When I come in the door and she sees me, I get a nice little smile. Aw, that's awesome.
Today was particularly bad, but God has a way of giving us what we need. I was playing with Haddy by having her sit on my knee while I held her hands. My goofy daughter proceeded to mercilessly lick and slobber my knuckles. It was so gross, yet so hilarious at the same time. We were both laughing very loudly. Haddy was squealing at me and was very proud of herself. She has a way of just filling my heart so full of love for her. Thanks God!

Reaping the Harvest

2009-07-10T07:07:00.000-07:00

This one is for Veta. I finally beat the slugs to the strawberries this year! We've been having such beautiful weather here lately. It's actually a little maddening. You know how it is in Ketchikan. When it's sunny, you'd better get out and enjoy it, because you never know when the sun will come again. Well, having a newborn doesn't make going any where very easy, as I'm finding out. I have a nice bug screen for Haddy, that keeps most of the bugs out, but it also keeps Mommy out pretty good too. So, we girls go out when we can, as long as we can before her highness has a fit.
But, I'm pretty proud of my small accomplishments. Picked strawberries; fixed the fountain and now it's three-tiered; chunked some trees and cleared them; kept the plants alive during the heat; planted a hanging pot; and I now have tomatoes, broccoli, and peppers growing in the greenhouse. Ooh! Also, I have some wonderful potatoes growing. Amazingly, I'm just growing them from some old potatoes from lastyear that I never used and just "went bad." Their greenery is getting pretty impressive. There's just something about havesting stuff that you've grown yourself. I don't know. Maybe it's just something that God put in us. Ya know, the very first occupation was gardener. (Oh, and Veta-- hopefully I'll get your garden weeded before you come the visit.)

Happy 4th!

2009-07-08T00:40:00.000-07:00

It was a good 4th of July. I helped in organizing the booths, but because of Haddy, I did not work them the entire two days, and it was a HUGE relief! What a stress free holiday. Haddy was great. We did go down to the booths to see if there was anything that needed doing. While it was super scary driving and walking downtown, God kept us safe and we got to show off Haddy's 4th of July outfits. Plus, Gramma and Grandpa were really glad to see our angel.

Haddy even got a chance to throw a bean bag or two. Give it time. She'll grow into it.

Ironically, Haddy and her cousin Mariah were wearing the exact same outfit. The crazy part was, these weren't even Walmart clothes. My mom got Haddy's outfit from Anchorage and Ruth's sister got Mariah's outfit from Portland. Yet, low and behold, on the 4th of July, these two cousins were at breakfast with the exact same duds. How funny is that?

Haddy was sporting her sun hat. Amazingly we needed it this 4th. It was so hot! I even got a tan and I wasn't out in the sun for very long. Haddy's head disappeared in that hat. She kind of looked like that one guy in Fat Albert.

Dad's Rule!

2009-06-29T18:58:00.001-07:00

I just want to take this opportunity to say how much I appreciate the men in my life. My dad is a bit goofy, kind of on a different page at time, but absolutely a life saver. He's always rushing over to make sure that Haddy is okay. He's always very concerned that she's too hot, or that she's uncomfortable being swaddled. Haddy absolutely loves just sitting and chilling with him. I love him very much and I thank God that he's here.

My father-in-law is a good man. He loves his grandkids and helps out where he can. He did a great job raising my husband, so I'm very thankful.

I'm so thankful that I have an opportunity to reconnect with my father, Jim. We've been very distant for years, even though we've usually lived in the same town. He loves his granddaughter very much and it reminds him, and gives him an excuse to express, how much he loves his daughter. I'm so glad we're getting to know each other.

And of course, where would I be without my hubby. My knight in dented armor. My Prince in rugged clothes. I love this man more than I can say, and sometimes I just really want to belt him one. But I haven't, so that must be love. He's such a great daddy, and an excellent husband. It was such a joy to finally celebrate a happy Father's Day with him.

Our little ray of sunshine

2009-06-25T22:38:00.000-07:00

Yes, it's great having a newborn baby. But admit it, when all they do is stare at you vacantly no matter how entertaining you're trying to be, it's kind of boring. Recently, Haddy has been smiling and occasionally laughing as she's finding her voice. It's been great. Aw... one smile is adequate payment for the long crying sessions and extremely early mornings.

Haddy and her cousin Kaeda on Father's Day.

Please continue to pray for my brother-in-law Robbie and his family. Just last week, our nephew "Mister" fell 20 feet off of a cliff near his grandparent's house and he hit his head. Praise the Lord, he came away with only a concussion. God's working in this family's life. It's getting scary, so pray that they get it together soon.

Episode at Rose's

2009-06-15T16:49:00.000-07:00

This last week, my mother had received a money gift from a fiend to celebrate Haddy's arrival. My mom took us all out to lunch and wanted to get a good picture to send back to her friend to show how we used the gift. We decided to do something yummy, and simple, since we haven't really taken Haddy to too many restaurants. Rose's Caboose was the choice. Ironically, we had been having 80 degree weather, but when we got there, it was cold and windy. (I was actually kind of relieved).

Anyhow! Lunch was great. We all sat in the caboose enjoying our meals. Haddy had her bottle and was just enjoying sitting in her car seat. It came time to the take the photo, so I took Haddy out of her seat... only to be greeted with a wet, sticky back. Yup. You guessed it- a blowout. I was so surprised, because normally Haddy has rather loud explosions to announce her necessity of a change. But in this case, she had sat there so quietly. Well, my dad, Grandpa, valiently lept into action. He quickly grabbed Haddy and held her football style with her back up so as not to spread the mess any more. Haddy was peeking out from under his arm with a confused look on her face. Dad started shouting for wipes. The rest of us couldn't respond because we were laughing too hard. The scene was hilarious! I won't go into too much detail, seeing as how this is all potty related. But the pictures are rather funny. In conclusion, we did get a family picture and the day was saved!

Goofy Girls

2009-05-29T15:12:00.000-07:00

I have been having way too much fun with my girls and a camera. When I say "my girls" I mean my baby and my dog. We've been very busy. Haddy is growing bigger, has tried lots of fashions, and we've still been doing what we usually do.

For walks outside, Haddy's been wearing her fashionable GAP coat that Krista's grandmother sent up for her. Here she's impersonating a Greek Fisherman.

Here Zatara is impersonating a deer. Isn't she talented?

Zatara and Haddy are becoming fast friends. I still don't let the dog kiss Haddy, however. Not until Haddy can at least fight back.

As Haddy gets older, she's getting a bit more shy and secretive. I think she's hiding something...

I can't imagine what it could be!

Haddy's ready for show biz. Already it's becoming a serious ordeal. We get stopped in grocery stores all the time with people just wanting to admire our baby. It's a bit annoying at times, but it also reminds us how incredibly blessed we are.

Sometimes Haddy likes to dress as an old lady and sleep for a long time. I can't really blame her. I do the same thing all the time.

Earlier this week, Haddy and I both had doctor's appointments. Dr. Haddy once again donned her scrubs so that she could help out. I love this outfit. It's just so darn cute.

Whew! After all that, who doesn't love a good, relaxing cup of coffee?

Haddy the Socialite

2009-05-11T20:13:00.000-07:00

So we've still been pretty busy, even with a newborn. Rick and I have really been purposing to still be involved with ministries and to include Haddy. It's been interesting. Haddy actually does amazingly well in social settings. She's been held by dozens of people, oohed and aahed over, and traveled tons. Yet, she doesn't seem to really get upset until we just stay at home. How ironic is that? Anyway, here are some of her adventures.

Haddy made her first appearance at church this last Sunday. She did really well. Everyone is amazed at how much hair she has. Here she is with her buddy Ashlen. She's half Ashlen's age (2 weeks compared to 1 month) and she's nearly twice the size. Look at her, she's already got that super model pose going for her.

Haddy's on the drums! Literally. It was pretty funny. During worship practice, Gramma sat Haddy on the congas while Daddy played. She actually quite enjoyed it. She almost fell asleep. Guess that'll be Daddy's new lullybye.

Haddy went with my mom and I to the Mother's Day breakfast. Scott Walker offered her some bacon and eggs, but Haddy decided to order the 'ala Mom special.

Haddy joined us for worship practice last Tuesday as well. She did really well during the singing, but she got hungry during prayer. I'm very blessed to have a daughter who absolutely loves music at such an early age. Right now her favorite song is "Mighty to Save." Seriously, I'm not making this up. She could be screaming her head off and I start singing that song, she quiets right down and listens. God is good.

Haddy's been having upset tummy lately, which makes a parent feel utterly helpless. Daddy's solution is dancing. It's rather cute. He has Haddy do the "Haddy Hop," which usually includes a goofy song and lots of kisses. What a great Dad.

The Lord provides!

2009-05-04T21:02:00.000-07:00

Allow me to yet again mark another milestone. Like the Israelites, I need to make my rememberances so that I do not forget how incredibly AWESOME God is!
In my last post, I had mentioned how I was convinced that Satan tried to kill my dog yesterday. I'm still pretty sure of it. The situation is just bizarre! I mean, like I said, that box of Slug Bait sat within the dog's reach for over a year. And when we put the box outside, it sat there for at least 3 days and she never touched it. There were indeed evil doings afoot.
Well, lastnight Rick and I talked seriously about what was going on. We purposed that we need to pray together more and read the Word together more. We also talked about how we were going to pay for Zatara's treatment. We were expecting it to be in the vicinity of $1300. What with the emergency hours (it was a Sunday after all), the treatment, and her overnighting at the vet. I had been saving up for a new washing machine, but I pretty much saw that money fly out the window. And we contemplated barrowing from others. But God had other plans.
Last month I had received a bank statement that addressed Rick's savings account. We weren't even aware that he still had a savings account, let alone had any money in it. It said there was about $400 in there. Rick called this morning to double check, and sure enough, there it was. Later, the vet called and said that Zatara was ready. My heart still anxious, but I knew God was going to pull us through somehow. I called the vet back and asked how much the bill was going to be, just to see how many strings I needed to pull and what I needed to shift around. The bill was only $443!!!
I immediately began crying and fell to my knees praising God! What a miracle! God literally pulled money out of now where! Both Rick and I were amazed, but not surprised. We have an almighty God fighting for us. The Lord gave us victory over the devil. And this just confirms to me that Zatara has an important role to play as well. She is Haddy's guardian. She's also a part of this family, and the Lord knew that we needed her. Give praise and glory to the Lord, for He is GOOD!

Pictures to go with the story.

2009-05-03T18:36:00.000-07:00

Here we are arriving for induction at 5:00 am. Look how happy we were. Boy, we really had no idea what we were in for.

Waiting for the Pitocin to kick in took an extremely long time. Part of the problem was that I had to be constantly monitored and I couldn't get up out of bed. This hurt my hips really bad. Krista read "Inkheart" while I read "Sisters Grimm." Are we teachers or what?

Only after prayer and a change in position did labor finally start. I kept a keen eye on the baby's heart rate to make sure that it didn't drop any more. Mom helped me out with my hair and was a constant comfort.

Haddy went home wearing her scrubs. Doesn't she look cute? Now she can go to work with Uncle Sean and look all professional.

Rick is the best dad in the world. What a wonderful husband! After enduring me screaming in his face for 4 hours straight, he still only expressed love for me. He's taken to being the king of diaper changes; he gets up in the middle of the night to comfort Haddy; he tries to let me sleep as much as I can; and he works hard to provide for his family. I love this man so much! And Haddy is pretty fond of her daddy too.

What a cutie pie! She can already wear hair clips and she isn't even a week old. Haddy is so expressive, especially when she's awake. I love her dark, dark eyes. What an amazing blessing from God!

Grandpa is absolutely smitten with Haddy. Every spare moment he had, he spent it with her. Unfortunately, Dad had to leave for Coastie stuff until the 15th of May. I know he's missing his granddaughter terribly. We're taking lots of pictures though and sending them to him.

The family has been having a ridiculously good time with Haddy. She's just so much fun! How gloriously blessed we are!

Thank you for your prayers. Please do continue to pray for us. We have a beautiful child who was born through prayer and who has been a huge testimony to us. Haddy has already been the youngest person in attendance at any Clover Pass prayer meeting. Satan is trying to discourage us. This morning he tried to kill our dog. Yes, it is a bold statement, but I'm pretty certain of it. There was a box of Slug Bait that I was sure was out of her reach when she was on her chain, and she had NEVER touched the box even when it had been sitting in the entry way ever since we've had her. But, somehow, this morning she tore into it. It could have been fatal. Zatara is Haddy's guardian. She keeps a close eye on that baby. If anything were to happen to her, it would be devastating. We took her to the vet and they expect her to pull through alright. But now that we took an animal to the vet for an emergency, I know that the bill is going to be astronomical. I'm not working, so financially we're REALLY stepping out in faith. I know God's going to provide. I just don't know how much for of these attacks I can take. Pray for us. Pray for us to be protected, watchful, and strong.

Introducing Hadassah Pickrell

2009-04-28T21:46:00.000-07:00

Let me sing of the mercies of the Lord! April 27th, 2009 the Lord blessed Rick and I with the most miraculous blessing my heart could ever endure. What a beautiful little girl! I tell you, it wasn't easy. And this baby was brought into the world by way of prayer.
Rick and I went into the hospital at 5:00am, happy and ready for induction. As I had said earlier, the plan was to use Cytotech, which was to be a bit easier on me. Well, apparently Rick and I can't do anything normally. We got all prepped and ready to go, but then the baby's heart rate dropped suddenly. This was a great cause for concern. After consulting with the midwife, Katrina, they decided to forgo the Cytotech and do pitocin. Dang... The problem was, they weren't sure if the baby was having trouble with the stress of labor, of if it was just positional. So then started the ridiculously long process of pitocin.
Because of the pitocin, I had to be under constant monitoring. I was not allowed to move about. I had asked if I could sit on an excercise ball. This felt great to me, but they couldn't get a clear monitor on the baby's heart rate. So it was back to the bed. After 13 hours of waiting around, I didn't go into labor. There just wasn't any gravity pulling the baby down. As time passed I got more and more upset. Katrina called in the OB doctor, Sarah Archer, to consult with her. She said that the baby's head had actually gone back up, and things weren't looking too good. The next option was a C-section. The Dr. Archer said that the likelyhood of me having a vaginal birth was 30%. Why wasn't this going the way I wanted it to? Hadn't I prayed? Wasn't I doing what God wanted me to do? Why had all my prayers for others been answered, but none for myself? I'm sorry to say, but I was starting to get mad at God. I knew this wasn't right, because He was going to give me a live, beautiful baby either way.
It was at this point that Krista started to make a few phone calls. "People need to be praying," she said. Because the heart monitor was so spotty, they put in what's called a scalp probe. It's a sharp, little, electrode that actually screws into the baby's head. Yeah, sounds real nice. Once they had that on baby's head, I asked if I could change positions, because lying in bed felt very counter-productive. They moved me to a rocking chair and started the pitocin again. It was at this point that a lot of mighty prayer warriors starting doing their fighting. Even people who weren't called and had no idea what was going were prompted to pray. And guess what... I started going into labor.
Some time back, I had looked up on youtube.com a video titled, "woman sings while in labor." This was recommended during our child birth class. What they didn't specify was that the woman singing was actually worshipping. She beautifully sang "Psalm 23" during her early labor and didn't even crack as she had a couple of strong contractions. I was so inspired by this video. What a wonderful way to bring a baby into the world! I had made a mix of worship songs for during labor. Now, I didn't sing like this woman, but I did manage to worship during the beginning of labor. I was pretty proud I made it all the way through "Wonderful, Merciful, Savior." Then, as the pitocin REALLY kicked it, I was pretty much knocked breathless.
I'm going to take a moment to brag about my husband. He did an amazing job during this entire process. The contractions were ruthlessly stacked on top of each other, and there was no rest in between them at all. I was so tired, I wanted to give up numerous times. But Rick, my awesome husband, made me maintain eye contact with him and he breathed with me through them all. He continually told me how much he loved me, and how proud he was of me. I didn't swear once, came close, but didn't cuss at all. During the really hard ones, he even told me to squeeze his hand, which is a very dangerous thing. But he kept his cool and really carried me all the way through.
When it finally came time to push, I was exhaughsted, in astronomical pain, and ready for a C-section. I honestly have no idea how I even made it through, except that the saints were praying and fighting on my behalf. The baby did not want to come out. It sounded like a horrible warzone in that room. I'm a little embarrassed at how much noise I was making, but honestly, there was no avoiding it. Her head was so big that it was making things close to impossible. I was just a hair's breath away from that C-section. Katrina was incredibly encouraging, even when things were going bad. The baby's heart rate dropped again several times. At one point it got dangerously low. They started to set everything out for an episiotomy. When I saw that syringe come for a local anestetic, I knew what was coming. And even though I was beyond tired, I knew I had to push, and hard. I was beginning to think this baby was never going to come out, and I even stated so; but then Katrina said loudly, "Okay Tiffany, it's time for you to meet this baby. PUSH!" And then that baby gloriously entered the world and I heard the most beautiful sound in my entire life: my daughter's first cry.
Rick's tears pretty much explain it all. She was beautiful, amazing, wonderful, worth it all. I just had to praise God. We had an audience out in the hall that consisted of grandparents and Auntie Krista. When they heard that little cry, a great cheer went up.
So here I am, sipping my OB cocktail, nursing the wounds of a 4th degree tear (which is the worst kind of tear that can happen), listening to the coos of my beautiful daughter, and contemplating all of these things. No, things didn't go the way I wanted them to. In fact, almost every single thing that I didn't want to happen, happened. But this was God's way. He wanted me to have a testimony that showed the mighty power of God and the incredible importance of prayer. This baby was conceived through prayer, grown healthy through prayer, and now, born through prayer.
Keep praying, even if you think it's a small thing. You never know who you're saving.

Welcome to the world, Haddy Jo!

An end in sight!

2009-04-25T12:32:00.001-07:00

Oh praise the Lord. I indeed will NOT be pregnant forever. At my last doctor's appointment on Thursday my midwife scheduled me for inducing on next Monday, the 27th. What a relief! I pretty much have the weekend to go into labor naturally, which would really be great. But if that doesn't happen, I go in VERY early on Monday morning. It's amazing the difference a for sure date makes. And God revealed to me an interesting point. I was very depressed and frustrated about being overdue, but God spoke to my heart an asked, "Is it really that bad, considering what you've been through?"
No, seeing as how I had my first baby prematurely, me being overdue just shows that my body can do it! I'm not a premature baby haver. There's blessing there, and I need to give glory to God. He has healed me, and He has given me a beautiful miracle. I am very excited that this baby is going to come before Rick has to go back to work. I am blessed that it's not going to be so much time that I get used to Rick being home all week. God's timing really is perfect. I should have figured that out by now, because it always works out that way. I just get impatient that God's not following MY agenda.
Please continue to pray. I really would like to go into labor naturally. But, I'm blessed that I'm not afraid of labor. They're planning on using Cytotech, which is actually an ulcer medication. Also, I will have to have an IV because I'm GBS positive, and I have a terrible time with IV's. Pray that when they put the needle in that they get it the first time and don't have to do multiple sticks. God is good, and he really does work all things for the good of those who love Him and are called according to His purpose.

I'm entitled to whine.

2009-04-23T09:56:00.000-07:00

** BIG SIGH**... So, now I'm past my due date. As numerous women have told me and most understand, this is not a great feeling. Everything hurts. I can't really sit down anywhere comfortably. And I'm just huge. I'm just so tired of waiting around for this kid! I have waited for almost 2 years for this child. Why won't she just come already?!
My frustrations are extremely common, but it doesn't really give me much of a sense of humor about it. Last week I didn't even go to church because I couldn't stand hearing all the comments from people. It's gotten to the point where I'll just walk into a room and well-meaning people will laugh at me. Normally, I would be fine with that, but lately it's hurting my feelings. Others will say things like, "You're next!" or "Haven't you had that baby yet?!" or "I'm surprised you're even here!" I know they just mean it as kind of a joke, but when you've heard it 20 times already, it's just not funny. Sometimes I just want to scream, "If it was up to me I'd have had this kid already! Do you think I WANT to birth a huge baby?!" But what good would that do me. It's really been a struggle. God's been teaching me about extending grace and mercy to others. I was doing okay until now. With each night that passes with no labor, I get more and more depressed. I know it has to happen soon, but I'm really getting impatient. Rick, who has been on vacation for the last 3 weeks, goes back to work next week. Some might ask, "Why the heck did he take vacation so soon?" Because we just didn't know. At 36 weeks, I think if I didn't calm down and take off from work, I probably would have had this kid, but too early. I'm really worried that he's not going to have time to spend with the baby. If he goes back to work before I have the kid, they won't let him off (well, not paid anyway) when I finally do go into labor. With all that we've been through, it would kill Rick not to be there. Financially, we can't afford him to miss work, especially now that I'm not working. The enemy is doing a good job of keeping me in worry. What a punk. I wish I could bash his face in. To accomplish this, I know I need to pray more. I'm just not really sure what to pray for. Anyway, I'm just rambling, writing out my frustrations, and sending them out into cyberspace. It's a beautiful day today. I'll go to my doctor's appointment, and then go for a lovely walk. :)

Hunting the Easter Bunny

2009-04-13T00:02:00.000-07:00

Aww... what a beautiful Resurrection Sunday. The sun was out. Had lunch with family. And went for a bit of rabbit hunting. Wait---what?!

Yup, that's right. This "Easter" Sunday my family and I went rabbit hunting. Here's the lowdown. Apparently my parent's neighborhood is getting overrun with rabbits. Mom kept talking about seeing rabbits over the last couple of days, but she didn't know where they came from, seeing as how wild rabbits isn't really a common thing around here. It turns out that one of the neighbors down the street had a coop containing the animals. There were 4 adults (2 males, 2 females) and 6 or 7 babies. It seems that the males chewed through their confined space to get to the females and then they all in turn chewed their way out of the coop. The owners are not home, and the person who is supposed to be taking care of them hasn't been around. So now, there are 10 or 11 rabbits out terrorizing the neighborhood. "Okay, really. How much damage can a bunny do?" you might ask. Let me tell you-- A LOT! Spring is finally in the air and we're seeing our first precious signs of green... and then they get eaten! My mom's crocuses (I don't care how it's spelled) are quickly disappearing. When Rick and I went over for lunch, Mom was showing me what was left of her flowers. We went inside, ate, and in that short time, more had "disappeared"! Everybody's gardens have been hit. The whole neighborhood is up in arms about the rabbits. Apparently, their not just sticking to destroying gardens either. These are mean animals. One of the neighbor's and his family managed to net one, and the thing went balistic. It was biting, scractching, and tearing out it's own hair trying to escape. Also, these frisky little devils have taken to violating cats! One neighbor's cat is declawed and a rabbit tried to mate with him. Poor kitty. That same neighbor also has a huge dog, which is great for keeping the bears away, but apparently he can't handle small, furry, vermin. He's been witnessed being chased away by two rabbits.

When I went over to my parents house, Mom and Sean were out "shooting rabbits," as my dad put it. I was thinking, "Wow, I didn't think Mom had it in her." Turns out, they were shooting a spring-loaded bebe gun at a rabbit and it didn't phase the dang thing. But Mom is mad enough to blugeon the pests. She's taken to weilding a walking stick whenever she's outside now. A good rabbit whapper. So, we went about today looking for rabbits; taking nets, bebe guns, sticks, and luck. One adult rabbit has been caught and returned to the coop. One baby has been caught by a neighbor girl, who last I heard was trying to convince her mom to let her keep it. Ha! I'm sure that went over realy well. We did spot a few, but no luck in the recovery department.

Aw... what a great Easter!

It is SO on, Caren!!!

2009-04-02T18:29:00.001-07:00

So here's the latest in the baby race, that's right, race. I just came back from my OB visit and, praise the LORD, I'm finally starting to dialate. It's only about a 1 or a 2, but it's something! Yay! So Caren and I are pretty neck and neck right now. We'll see who goes first. (I'm really praying it isn't a full OB ward when we get there). Good luck, Caren. We're both going to do this the natural way!

Open mouth, insert foot

2009-03-27T21:00:00.000-07:00

It's amazing how quickly a little word like "c-section" can flip your whole perspective around. Last Thursday I had yet another OB visit. This time, baby was measuring big. I'm up for another ultrasound next week to get a good gestimate at how big my baby is and whether or not we need to consider the possibility of a c-section. I'm scared. I know that's from the enemy, but this is not what my heart wants. I'll do what I have to, but I just feel that with a ceasarean I'll be missing out on so much. Plus, the recovery time would be awful. I'm also scared of needles going into my spine (i.e. epidurals and spinal blocks). I know thousands of women have had this, and I know doctors do it all the time... I just don't want it.
So, where earlier this week I was incredibly reluctant to do anything that might instigate my labor, I'm now full-bore trying to get this kid going. I walked a lot yesterday. I walked tons today. I'm lifting heavy objects, doing squats, tiring myself out... the works. I've also gotten into some rather embarrassing conversations (not really embarrassing to myself, but to those who are around me-- namely Krista). I know that this baby is going to come in God's perfect timing. We've been praying all year long. And I know my baby is going to be born healthy, I just neglected to specify how. Please... keep praying.

So here's the update.

2009-03-22T23:04:00.000-07:00

Okay, my doctor says that baby's growth and everything is fine. No, she's not too big. No, they're not going to induce. But over the last couple of days, things have really been kicking into high gear.
My brother Sean JUST left for a friend's wedding down in Washington. Before he left, he told me rather emphatically that I was NOT going to have this baby while he was gone. "Uncle Sean" really wants to be here. Well, just the day before, baby dropped down and it was really hard to walk to sit. Then after he left Saturday, I was experiencing some small pains in my back. I'm rather paranoid now. So anytime I have the slightest pain, I immediately stop, wait, and see what happens. This morning at church I had continuous pains for about 4 hours. They were small, but they did come in waves. Rick, Krista, and my mom were very anxious. I was very hesitant to do anything about it. However, I did eventually call the OB ward and they assured me it was only Braxton Hicks (practice contractions). I'm term (37 weeks) next week, so I'm finally ready to wind down and focus on baby. I'm trying to get through this last week of school and then I'll go on maternity leave. Rick keeps trying to prompt this baby to come sooner. He's super excited. I wish I could share his enthusiasm at this time. I am excited, but I have so much to do before our new arrival.
Unfortunately, things are a bit hectic right now. There are some rather stressful things going on at school and just today my dog developed diarreah. FUN! My house really stinks right now. So, please, keep us in your prayers like I know you have been doing. I really appreciate everyone so much. We couldn't do this without your support. :)

Hurray for chubby cheeks!

2009-03-06T19:47:00.000-08:00

So, I had probably one of my final ultrasounds today. I was in for a bit of a freak out. Apparently, baby is two weeks ahead of schedule as far as its growth goes. I'm a bit intimidated at this prospect. Of course, this was at the word of the ultrasound tech (a very nice girl by the way). We'll have to see what the doctor says. I mean, I was already kind of freaked out at the thought that I'm having a baby just next month, but at the thought of having a baby by the end of THIS month... yikes. The tech kept asking if I was diabetic, but all my tests have thankfully come back negative. I've only been gaining 1 pound every two weeks. If I keep that average, baby should be somewhere in the vacinity of 8-9 pounds by 40 weeks. The tech said that baby is somewhere from 6-7 pounds right now! Boy, I was ready to go right up to OB and say, "Induce me now!"

It'll be fine. I'm super excited, just a little razzed and there's a lot to do before hand. I have to have all of my lessons plans ready ASAP, because honestly, I could have this baby at anytime. Some days, by how much its flipping about, I think it's ready to come out too. That's good. My hips are killing me from carrying around, apparently, 6-7 pounds with just my waistline.

We're having a co-ed baby shower on Friday the 13th. I know... it wasn't intentional, it just kind of turned out that way. I've never really understood why daddy's were never allowed to come to these things. I'm very fortunate with how much Rick already has been involved with this baby, and I think he deserves to be showered with love just as much as me. It's going to be great. Mom and Krista already have some pretty outrageous games planned.

Here's baby's latest profile. It's getting big. I'm realizing that some of these pictures are kind of like warshack tests; you're never really quite sure what you're going to see. In this picture you can see the side of Kosher's nose, a closed eye, lips, and some very Native-looking chubby cheeks. It's an odd picture, but I find myself enamored with it. What fun.

Counting down

2009-02-19T19:32:00.000-08:00

Boy, I had a weird realization the other day. I'm going to have a baby... REAL soon. I mean, I can count the weeks left on my hands now. Only 8 weeks to go. Now that it's getting closer, I'm not so sure about what I have gotten myself into. I know it'll be fine. It's just intimidating to think of how much needs to be done around my house, but I have absolutely no time or energy to do anything about it. I've been begging God for a day off from school so I can get my house ready, but He keeps saying no. I have no substitute, or aide, and we've had clear weather. I'm physically exhausting myself. I've been fighting off all the illnesses that my students bring on, and I'm not getting much sleep. Lately, it's been hard just to walk. Sorry... now I'm just whining. Oh well, right now, I'm entitled. As soon as I have this baby, no one's going to really care anyhow. They'll just tell me to suck it up.
I have another ultrasound coming up in a couple of weeks. I'm looking forward to it. We're still trying to figure out what this kid is. It's been kind of funny lately. I can sit and watch my tummy and see it move when my baby kicks. It reminds me a lot of the movie "Alien." Such fun.

You get diamonds from pressure.

2009-02-05T22:11:00.000-08:00

So... I haven't really written because nothing REAL huge has been going on. I don't have any pictures or amusing stories. We are successfully 30 weeks pregnant (yipee!) and looking forward to meeting this beautiful child. Our birthing classes are going well. I'm enjoying getting to meet a lot of the OB nurses, although I do miss our own CPCC nurse (oh Jen, you are always in our hearts).
The pressure certainly has been laid on lately. Rick and I have been engaging in regular spiritual warfare, and with that comes attacks on both personal lives and family. Clover Pass is starting to see the stirrings of revival, which is awesome! The enemy doesn't like it, so he's on the move. Rick's been fighting for his older brother Robbi; please be in prayer that he gets right with God. School is really starting to get stressful. I love those students very much; I don't care for the attitude that's been popping up lately. I also have so much to think about with preparing for the baby that I am VERY easily overwhelmed these days. My mom has been planning on retiring from DMV for awhile now, and just as an actual date was starting to form-- her co-worker puts in his 6 week notice. That was a couple of weeks ago. There's a hiring freeze on with the state right now, so getting a replacement is going to be difficult. However, I'm proud of Mom in the sense that when she needs to leave, she's going to leave; no nonsense. So, that's just a few of the things that are going on. God is good. He always is. Of course, prayer is valued above all else. We are still living great, adventurous lives; and it's in these hard times that we really grow in character and our spiritual walk. It's hard to thank God for the hard times, but they are necessary.

Still Rockin' it!

2009-01-21T17:31:00.000-08:00

So things are progressing nicely, and for some reason I'm SUPER stressed out. I'm not exactly sure what it is. Krista says it's because I take everything and I think about it too much. She's probably right. There's just so much to do. School's getting demanding, the dog's getting annoying, Rick's kind of flighty lately, and I'm huge and tired. Life's still good, it's just... complicated? Is that the word I'm looking for?
Rick and I have been taking childbirth classes. It's been an experience. With Azalea, I had a 10 second crash coarse in delivering that baby. I don't really want to do that again. However, after lastnight, I'm kind of rethinking this whole thing and thinking "ignorance is indeed bliss." They showed a diagram of the pelvic bone and a baby dropping through it. AAAAAAAHHHHHH!!! Hey, I've already done it once before, but YIKES!!! I told Rick, that's it, he's going to have to have the baby, because I'm done. They talked about the different stages and labor and the dreaded episiotomies! Oh man... again, I've already done this once, but Azalea was small! I really am dreaded having that 13 lb. baby. It's good inspiration though. I've been doing my squats and kegel exercises. Next I work on breathing. I'm amazed at how much those squats help my hips! It's been kind of funny. The only time I really have to do my squats is when I'm in school, so I challenge my students to a squat contest. Today they made it to a minute (I'm up to two now. Yay for me!). I haven't had anyone just walk into my class yet. It's only a matter of time.
Time is drawing closer, and I've very excited about having this baby. I think Tim's getting a bit stressed about the amount of subs that CPCS will be needed. I'm actually really stoked at the prospect of having Heidi Poet come and sub for me. I was praying (and stressing) about it one day, and then her name just came to me. Heidi had expressed an interest at one time about teaching. We're in "negotiations" right now; she just has to be approved by the school board, but I know she'll be wonderful. If it gets shot down, well, then the school board can just find me a sub, because I'm done. My priorities lie with baby! (Is that selfish? Maybe a little. I love my students and I love the school, but I want this baby).

Have I mentioned God is good?

2009-01-09T18:57:00.000-08:00

My heart is filled to bursting at my excitement. God is truly amazing. I had a follow-up ultrasound yesterday to check on that previa I had mentioned earlier. Everything is A-okay! I'm so relieved that one threat of having to have a C-section is eliminated. And bonus, the ultrasound tech got us the most beautiful picture I have ever gotten from this kid!

It took my kid 6 weeks to develop a nose, but there it is! Look at those lips! And that chin! Krista keeps gushing about the lips. Azalea had my mouth too, so it's pretty cool. Rick did ask the tech if we could try to see what it was; and...

it's a baby. Actually, the tech did say it looked like _______, but it was really tough to say. We're about 70% sure of what it is, but I'd hate to announce to everyone what it is, and then come birthday time... oops! Sorry you only have dresses little boy; or sorry we only have Carharts for you little girl. So there in lies our joy. We are so thankful to the Lord.

My bump, my bump, my lovely baby bump!

2009-01-01T14:48:00.000-08:00

So during my time off I finally got back into the kitchen and did some baking. I made an awesome looking pirate ship cake! It was pretty fun to decorate it. I'm not so sure that I'm going to eat it though (I didn't have real sugar, and I didn't find the Crisco until after I had already floured the pan). But it looks great! The ship is crewed by the Grummy bears. That's gummy bears that turn into pirates (stupid me wrote it wrong on my grocery list). I even made a Native inhabited island to get pillaged (the Natives are all white).

Krista was laughing at me, because with my "Domestic Diva" apron on my baby bump sticks out in a rather cute fashion. We had fun enduring the snow. And hurray hurray, we're 25 weeks now!

HAPPY 2009!!!!

Whoo Hoo!

2008-12-28T21:43:00.000-08:00

I was waiting to get some cool pictures, but that's not going to happen.
Anyway, I am now officially over 24 weeks pregnant! Hurray! This is indeed a very momumental thing for Rick and me. This is the longest I have ever been pregnant. What a great thing to be able to share this with my church family. I know there are so many prayers coming our way, and we are truly truly blessed.
We just had an OB appointment on Friday, and everything is great. Baby's heartbeat is strong and beautiful. I haven't had any pains at all and daily I feel the little karate kid kicking me. It's fantastic! And let me tell you, I have some of the best friends in the whole wide world. Knowing that this milestone was a big one for me, Krista, Stephanie Hemminger, my mom, and Anna Scott took me out to lunch and we had a 24 week party. They got me some baby gifts. It was pretty awesome. I am so incredible blessed!!!
I will keep everyone updated. We have another ultrasound in early January (they're keeping a eye on that previa), so maybe we'll be able to find out what we're having.
Toodles!

God is good!

2008-12-09T19:14:00.000-08:00

Praise be to God from whom all blessing flow!
So far, crisis has been averted. I am so incredibly thankful for God's family and the prayers of His saints. My appointment went well today. No rupture, and baby is okay. I do have a small bladder infection, which means that my arch nemesis, dehydration, is back but I will overcome (*sigh* I hate water). Everyone who I consulted today was a woman, which made me feel more comfortable. The problem with being pregnant is that your private parts suddenly become public domain. But everybody was every encouraging and assuring me that I had made the right choice of coming in. Actually, it was my mother and Krista who made the right choice in forcing me to come in, but that's another blessing from God. Tomorrow is 22 weeks. God is good, and this baby was prophecied over. In my head I know that this baby is going to be okay; I just wish the rest of me would catch up. I find myself envying those women who just seem to pump out babies as if their some kind of factory. If only they knew what kind of gift they had.
Thank you, everybody! My joy has been restored to me, and my heart is so blessed by your love. God bless you all, and MERRY CHRISTMAS!!! :D

Please Pray!

2008-12-08T23:16:00.000-08:00

I know already lots of you out there are praying for us. And believe me, I covet your prayers more than anything. This is an exceptionally worrisome and stressful time for us. I am almost to the 22 week mark in my pregnancy, which is good. Things have been going great, and I rejoice at feeling my little one jumping around inside me. But there are some matters going on.
I've been diagnosed with marginal placenta previa, which apparently is common in a lot of pregnancies, but it can cause infection and make it so I would have to get a C-section. Please pray that it goes away. Also, this morning I had a bit of a scare. I'm going to get it checked out tomorrow, but I'm afraid I might be leaking amniotic fluid. This was something that happened when Azalea was born. So please, pray for us. I've been carrying a mountain of worry around all day, and my heart is crying out to God for His mercy. He is welcome to do whatever He wants, and he also knows that my heart's desire. Krista is claiming in the name of Jesus Christ that we are going to get to 24 weeks; then after that we're claiming 34 weeks, but one step at a time.
Please pray that worry and fear stay out. I went into this pregnancy handing my worry over to God, and now the enemy keeps bringing it back upon me. Pray that God will give me the stregth to put it down and keep it away.
Thank you all. I am very blessed by this family that God has given me.

More sightings

2008-11-22T22:37:00.000-08:00

And we found out we're having...

A BABY! Nope, we could not determine the gender of our baby. But we do have an active little one. We're already 19 weeks, and things are going well. Please do continue to pray for us. Little worries are trying to creep in, but we will not give them any place.

Costume party!

2008-11-02T22:53:00.000-08:00

Alright, so, yes it was Halloween this last Friday. However, I don't believe that we should "give" the devil any days. I say, they're all God's days and the devil's too much of a jerk to have even a whole day to himself.

So, we and our friends got together and had a "Rockin' costume party" to celebrate costumes, not Halloween. Personally, I love costumes; and any excuse I get to wear one, I'm all over it. Here's some of what occured that night.

Our only trick or treaters. They made out like bandits!

Zatara the sheriff. She did a good job (except for the extreme farting).

So here's the story we came up with. The fairy realm was in trouble because the dark angel (Stephanie) did... something. I don't know what, but the fairies were in trouble and they needed to play the sacred song. However, they didn't have a super musician to rock out on the guitar. So their prince (Rick) called upon the Purple Avenger (Tiff-- look how pregnant I look in that picture!) to come and save the kingdom with her rock. Well, that's just what she does. So the sacred song was played--which happens to be "Carry on my wayward son" by Kansas (it's a favorite of Rick and Sean's on Rockband). The day was saved. And then Rosie the Riveter (Crystal) showed up and her and the Purple Avenger rebuild the fairy city on Rock 'n Roll.

New Sightings!

2008-10-02T17:17:00.000-07:00

What is it?! Is it Bigfoot?! A UFO?! The Locke Ness Seamonster?!

No... it's just baby Kosher Pickrell. This little guy has already been in for two ultrasounds and he's not really willing to give up a good picture. Caren Cooke says that's how you know it's a boy-- he won't sit still for a picture. We actually don't know gender yet; I'll just refer to him as a he for the time being. I did the same thing to Azalea. I have to admit, we were kind of hoping for twins, but I'm perfectly happy with one baby. We'll have our hands full enough as it is; and this way, we don't need to buy another crib and new stroller and all that jazz. Apparently Caren and I are racing for due dates. It's okay, she can win. I just want my baby to arrive ON TIME and healthy. We're very excited for the new member of the Pickrell family. Please continue to keep us in your prayers.

Be watchful...

2008-09-23T07:43:00.000-07:00

I had a rather disturbing, yet eye opening experience this last weekend. As I was ranting before, it was Azalea's birthday last Friday. We ended up having a sweet, little tea party in Azalea's honor, and that was really nice.
Later that evening, my mom and I were invited to a women's conference. Now, we were invited by someone I respect very much, so I had kind of a dilemma about whether or not I was going to go. But I had resolved that if there was something that I needed to do, I was not going to use Azalea's sorrow as an excuse any more-- I've already done that too much. So, we went.
Perhaps some of you who are here in Ketchikan went to that conference, and perhaps you really had a remarkable experience meeting the Holy Spirit there. I truly hope so. That was not the case for me. Now I don't shy away from events where people worship differently than me. In fact, I relish it. I love worshipping with God's family, regardless of where they call their "home." But this event was quite intimidating for me. And there was something that was simple not right. The focus appeared to me on loudness and the worship leader. There was the speaking of tongues from the stage, but no interpretation. I know that there's a prayer language, and we should use it, but if you're going to do that, put the microphone down! I sincerely did go there with a mind to worship and be encouraged by my sisters, but instead I brought something else back with me. I left there extremely annoyed-- and rather judgemental.
Later that weekend, I found out that one of my friends was doing something that I thought was rather stupid. I was really mad! I didn't understand why it affected me so, I mean, it wasn't like they were screwing up my life. Well I stewed about this for days. I gossiped and slandered, and by the time Sunday rolled around I felt yucky, guilty, and just down right horrible. I couldn't fully enter into worship, because I knew that something was not right in my heart. But I couldn't shake it!
Pastor Cooke was preaching about putting off the old man and being transformed by the Holy Spirit. I had heard this before, and knew I should be renewed, but why couldn't I. Then God gave me a revelation. He reminded me of a conversation I had had with Sean the night before. Sean was playing drums for that conference, and he had expressed to me that when he left, he was exceptionally angry. He didn't even listen to music on the way home because he was so mad. He then told me that he knew there was an evil presence with him there. He said that he was just so tired that he simple told the demons to go away. When I remembered this, I had to stop and think-- Did something come home with me from that conference that was not the Holy Spirit? Yes, something had, and it was appealing to my old self who was vengeful, easily angered and judgemental. I was annoyed, no longer with people, but at how easy it was for the enemy to slip in through my defenses. I immediately spoke the name and Jesus Christ and demanded that the demons go away and take my old self with them. Instantly my heart was relieved, I had joy again, and my sore throat that I had all day was gone. Rick refers to it as God healing the land. Now, I'm not saying that demons made me do the things that I did, because I made my own choices; and I obviously had something inside me still to be latched onto.
Here's my point-- as Christians we must always be watchful. When we go to worship somewhere, anywhere, how does it line up with Scripture. They may tell you that you are going to meet the spirit there, but how do you know what kind of spirit it is? They may intend the Holy Spirit, but even the enemy can come to church unless you tell him to get out. I picked up some demons at a "Christian" function, and that troubles me. Now, I don't think any less of the women who were there, and some of the ladies I still respect a lot. I'm sure for some it was an uplifting time, and again, I hope it was. But always be watchful, and always be on your guard.

Early Morning Musings

2008-09-19T05:01:00.000-07:00

Today is my daughter's birthday. Right now, I'm up very early because my own sensibilities will not let me sleep. The weight of this day is very overwhelming for me. Last year, at almost 1:00 in the morning, I heard that most wonderful, heart-wrenching words ever. The nurse, Cindy, leaned down, kissed my forehead and said, "Tiffany, you're a mother!"

Rick and I often refer to this day as the best and worst day of our lives. We're not mad at God-- how can you be mad at someone who gave you such a wonderful gift in the first place? I have come to terms with the whole thing, I'm just missing my little girl, and that's okay.

In all honesty, I don't really know why I'm writing this. Perhaps I just need to send my thoughts out into space in hopes that it may help someone. I like to think that I've held myself together really well. Every chance I get, I have to tell of God's greatness and how He has truly blessed my husband and I. I guess part of me is just sad at how superficial we make things sometimes. Lately, I've just heard so much about friends and family that are either getting divorced, or don't seem to care about their children very much. Why can't they see what a privilege it is to have either of those?! Sure marriage is difficult, but you have to remember that you not only vowed to each other, you vowed to God. That's a pretty serious thing. There's been plenty of times where that's been the thing holding my husband and I together, and I'm glad it did. I never would have made it this far without my other half. And children, I know their loud, smelly, and slimy most of the time-- but what a gift! To hold that little hand, and to express love, and to have it expressed back to you with smiles or uprooted flowers you just planted, boy... what a wonderful thing.

Don't worry about Tiffany. My heart is healing and is full of joy. God truly has given me a wonderful life. No, I don't have everything, but God makes my life good. Please continue to pray for us. I go in for my first OB appointment on the 25th of this month. Pray that everything goes well. Also, I'm now a high risk pregnancy. Pray that I won't need to go to Seattle or Anchorage to have this baby. I want to do my best to teach school as long as I can. Thank you for indulging my thoughts.

Cat's out of the bag...

2008-08-30T21:10:00.000-07:00

Alright... for those of you who may not already know... I'm going to have another baby! Rick and I are beyond excited. It actually is an incredible testimony. Allow me to share.
Last year after Azalea was born, our OB doctor recommended that we wait a year before trying again for a baby. This was absolute agony, as I knew that I had had a baby, but my house was eerily quiet. I like to think that we've hadled ourselves well, considering the hurt and dissapointment. Sure, there were some days when it was hard just to get out of bed, but we still did what needed to be done. As June came around, my pills ran out and I just decided not to get any more. I figured it was close enough to a year. And I have to say, I was expecting to put a bun in the oven right away, since that was what happened last time.
Well, God being who he is didn't want it to be that simple. This was a special event. I developed some physical problems that made getting pregnant difficult. And in the inbetween times I was burning through pregnancy tests like crazy (and they are not inexpensive). It was a difficult time for me emotionally, because I wanted this so badly and every negative test was a stab to the heart. However, it says in God's Word that our Spirits prayers louder and more effectively than our own words ever could. And he knew that on a daily basis my heart cried out bitterly for a baby.
Earlier this summer, we had a man come from Honduras by the name of Felicito Nunez (I think that was his last name). He spoke powerfully, and was full of the Spirit. He really convicted me. He had said that he had the privelege to be at all of the prayer meetings in the church, but then he asked, "Do you not have any young people here? Are there only grey-heads in this church?" Boy, that struck me hard. I had been neglecting going to Friday night prayer because of my own excuses. And the enemy was using Azalea as a big weapon against me. I knew it was always a battle to get to prayer, but until then, I hadn't realized that the enemy was wiping the floor with me. So, Rick and I said, "Enough is enough!" and got back to praying. While Felicito was speaking that night, I felt a stirring in my Spirit and I knew I needed to go up and pray about this baby situation. Moments later, I felt Krista's hand on my shoulder and she whispered, "I just really feel that if he gives an altar call, you need to go up and we'll pray for healing with this baby stuff." I immediatly started crying, I mean, is God obvious or what? Felicito did give a call, but it was so different that what we were used to. And silly me, I let fear keep me in my seat. I didn't go up. I knew I needed to, but I stayed glue to me seat. The worship team was called up to play for communion, and the whole time I was bawling my eyes out because I knew I didn't do what I was supposed to. When the service was over, I asked Rick if we should go pray. He wasn't quite aware of what was up, but he said, "Let's go to the prayer room." That wasn't quite what I knew I had to do, but it was a start. As we made our way towards the prayer room, all of a sudden, there was Felicito, almost as if God had cleared him for us. I immediately went over to him and told him that I needed prayer. Very friendly like he said, "Okay. I will pray for you." It was amazing! I didn't even tell him what I needed prayer for... he just knew it. He prayed for a family for Rick and I. He prayed that we would have it in GOD'S TIMING. And then he told us that God was indeed going to give us a family. That we were going to be rewarded with children.
As if being prophecied over wasn't enough, there's more. The same weedend as Rick's and my anniversary, there was a women's retreat with Margie Rose. It was wonderful. A real moving of the Spirit. On the first night, when we had ended, Chrissie McClennan closed by saying that if we need prayer that we should go up and pray, and not leave here without taking care of matters with the Lord. I knew that I should go and pray, because I was frustrated with not yet being pregnant, and what better person to pray with me than a sister in Christ? Well, at the same table I was sitting at, two women starting talking about babies. It was simple, and innocent, and I wasn't even part of the conversation; but I let Satan tweek the hurt in my heart and I left without praying. I used the hurt as an excuse to keep me from doing what I was supposed to do. It was a Friday, so I later went to prayer and I tried to push it out of my mind. It was not big deal, tomorrow I'd do the right thing, it doesn't matter. Well, at prayer, Rosie Walker started praying for the women who passed up the oppotunity to pray. Oh man,... Rosie was telling on me without even knowing it! Actually, it was the Spirit through Rosie that was telling me I needed to get right. So then I prayed, asking for forgiveness, but it exploded into something more. I realized then and there how big of a weapon the enemy had against me, and I needed to give all the pain over to God. I didn't want to be manipulated by my hurt anymore. Then everyone there gathered around and put there hands on me, and Rosie prayed a beautiful prayer over me. She was the sister in Christ I needed to pray with. David Michael was there as well. He is an Indian man from Australia, who pastors a church in Melbourne. He also prayed over me, not knowing my exact situation. But he encouraged me to pray as Hannah prayed--crying out to God for a child that she would give right back to him. I did, and me heart was healed so much that night. David also told me to study Samuel I, and get the promises from God that were written there. I couldn't help realizing that Hannah's praise was exactly the kind of thing that I would sing too. This was Friday night.
The very next day, I felt compelled to take yet another pregnancy test. Seems very close, and I was going to wait... but I felt I had to. Wouldn't you know, it was positive. I didn't want to be premature with my news... but I knew in my heart that this was my promised child (or children, we joke). Part of me wanted to wait until I was further along, but how could I keep something so wonderful a secret? And I would have been keeping it secret out of fear, which would have been the same thing as worshipping the thing I didn't want to come to pass. We told my parents and everyone that was at prayer on Friday. It was David's last day with us, and he was so excited. He started crying and telling us how much we had blessed him.
We were going to keep in underwraps for a bit longer, but on Paul's final night here of preaching, there was just such a strong moving of the Spirit. And as they asked for testimonies of the wonderful things that God has done, I KNEW I had to speak.
So here I am now. And enormous sorrow has been lifted from my heart. I look expectantly to what God brings us. For all who read this, please please please pray for us. Pray that our baby, or babies, is born healthy, and on time. I'm enjoying my morning sickness, and my fatigue. Know I know that it all will be worth it. PRAISE GOD for His infinite blessings!!!

Good times

2008-08-20T10:53:00.000-07:00

This last week Rick had ten days off. It was marvelous. I had all these plans for all these things that we were going to get done, but it didn't turn out that way, and that's okay. Zatara has especially appreciated having her daddy home, she hardly gets to see him at all. I am so thankful to God for giving me a husband like Rick. Yes, he drives me crazy... well, most of the time, but he really is a great man.

I took this picture awhile ago, but I thought it was so cute. Zatara had a very long day, but she still wanted to hang out in the living room with us. She fell asleep with her chew toy in her mouth.

Oh August, how art thou?

2008-08-15T17:31:00.000-07:00

Rick and I just celebrated our 3 year anniversary! Hurray! It actually turned out to be a great evening. I was a little worried, because our original plans had fallen through. We were going to go to Reno and check out the Atlantis Resort and Spa (where Kristi Baum used to work). However, the spa wasn't open until September, and that was pretty much the whole reason to go, seeing as how we're too poor to gamble. We ended up spending the entire day together trying to get my garden fountain to work. Then we cleaned up and had and expensive dinner at Annabels. It was actually pretty fun living it up. I had budgeted enough money for us to have a really fancy dinner: champaigne, appetizers, the works. Then we strolled over to the movie theatre and watched "Batman," which was actually really good. It was a terribly romantic evening. It was actually one of the best dates we've ever been on.

As stated before, I've been working really hard on the Azalea court, and things are really coming along. I can't really use my hands any more, but here's some pics.

BEFORE NOW (with Dad and Sean's help)

The starts of the fountain. Here's what it looks like now.

I just assembled a bunch of junk that I found around the yard. I got the idea from Denny Terry. I actually love my fountain a lot. Just ask Krista :)

Adventures in Daycare

2008-08-05T13:04:00.000-07:00

Over the summer I did some part-time at the Clover Pass Daycare (what can I say, CPCC is my home away from home). I had no desire to going back to the insensitive grind of the tourist industry, so I decided to try my hand at child care. It was a big jump for me, because unlike most girls, I didn't grow up babysitting little infants and drooling toddlers. I had never even changed a diaper in my entire life! And actually, I had a big fear of infants. It's always a little disconcerting having the parents eyeing you suspiciously as you over-cautiously, and awkwardly hold their tiny, squawking brood. Most parents would make jokes about it, which never really did reassure me. I just figured I'd learn all of this baby stuff out of necessity when I had my own kids. Well, due to circumstances, I figured I'd better get a heads up before I got pregnant again. And the experience has really been an eye opener.
I've found that I can actually work really well with babies. It's been pretty fun actually. Aside from coming home utterly exhausted, with a shirt soaked in saliva and snot, and tiny, aching scratches on my face-- it's been good. I've discovered that the unique "baby smell" is actually a combination of every single body fluid and baby powder... yum. Within my first week of working there, I pretty much got over my fear of babies. Once you've changed a dozen diapers without throwing up and rocked about six different babies to sleep, you start to feel pretty good about yourself. There's also been some pretty funny moments.
One day, I was helping out on the preschool side, and one of the little boys had a doll stuffed under his shirt. He was laying on his back while three other kids were all surrounding him. One had a stethoscope and another had numerous bottles, while the third had a toy, plastic power tool and was "sawing" into the boy. I asked them, "What are you doing?" They just simply glanced up at me and replied, "We're having a baby." I had to quickly turn about and casually walk off, because I nearly died laughing-- it was so cute.
I am relieved to have some time off once again so that I may get my house in order and the ground work laid for the Azalea court. But I am very thankful for the opportunity to step out of my comfort zone and confront some irrational fears. And I would strongly suggest that if anyone out there has the same fears that I did, they should see about doing some care taking as well. Now don't relate having your own kids to barrowing someone elses, because it's not the same at all. I see how those kids faces light up when they see their mom or dad come walking through the door. There's no substitute for adoration like that.

Update

2008-08-01T15:49:00.000-07:00

Alright, so I've been crazy busy the last month or two. Also, on top of everything, my internet has not been working. I think some things are finally getting resolved.

As of late I have repaired my home, split wood, stacked the entire wood shed, participated in a college class, helped oraganize a school fundraiser, gardened, help put in a new water tank, and worked at the daycare. Wow... it's been a good summer!

I'm realizing the reward of being a "domestic diva," as my new apron calls it. I'm one who's all for women's lib. and I have no intention of giving up my job once the Good Lord allows me to keep my children earthbound. However, making your home your castle is a very rewarding feeling. I've never split wood before in my entire life, but this summer I've finally tried my hand at it, and thankfully not losing a hand in the process, I feel pretty good about it. Great exercise! I've also learned to use a chainsaw, which seems to worry quite a few men (what is it with guys and power tools?). I'm continuing the battle of keeping my home clean, which seems like a never ending endevour considering my husband and my dog, both whom I love dearly. Also, I'm learning to make lunches the night before. This is a completely new process for me. However, it became necessary as a money saving venture.
I have also broken ground on the Azalea court. It's been tough work. I'm been the only one working on it so far. With the exception of my father-in-law who last November cut down a tree while Rick and I were away in Anchorage for my surgery and he landed the tree on my beautiful Mt. Fuji cherry tree. I've been hoeing the ground by hand (yes, some of my friends still snicker everytime I pronounce, "I've been hoeing today.") The turf comes up like a big thick carpet and it is very heavy. However, I have some extrememly beautiful azaleas that are more than ready to be put into place, most provided by loving friends and family. The center of the court is going to be a beautiful Northern Lights scented azalea that Denny Terry got me for this last Mother's Day. The Lord gave her the sense that I was hurting on that day more than usual. Most people don't know, but I found out that I was pregnant with Azalea on Mother's day. The shrub with be dazzaling. As I'm working, I find myself crying out to God that all the rest of my children will be good and healthy. Firstly because my heart cannot withstand such another drastic heartache, and secondly, because I'm not building another garden like this one!
The daycare has been another adventure all together, which I will write about later. In the mean time, God Bless you all!

:)

Best Friends

2008-06-02T22:57:00.000-07:00

Well everyone else seems to have deemed their blogs as "Baby blogs," so I'm going to plaster the internet with my own babies. It's so cute how Cid and Zatara are just the best of friends. It's a huge relief too.
I just have to thank God for giving Rick and I Zatara. She really has filled a painful void in our lives. She helps remind me that, yes, I am a good mother. Especially during those times when people say really insensitive stuff like, "Are you sure you want to have a baby?" I know they don't mean any harm, but stuff like that just really hurts me down to the quick, as if they even understood. So, anyway, enough musing. Here's pictures!

Jello Shinanigans

2008-05-19T23:42:00.000-07:00

Alright, so when the going gets tough, the tough get Jell-O. Last field day at the school was Russel's last day of school. Well, Krista and I couldn't just let that go. Also, I had just introduced Krista to "The Office" and now she's absolutely in love with Jim Halpert. So, that's where we got the idea from.

We took Russel's classroom key and set it in Jello. It was great. It was easy enough to sneak it off of his key ring. However, I think I inadvertantly lied to him. I saw him the previous night and he asked me, "So do you know what happen to my key?" but he asked it in a tone like he was telling me a story-- like, "so do you know what my dog did today?" I told him, "No, I don't know," as in "No, tell me your story." Well he proceeded to tell me that he had his key there one minute and gone the next. How was I to tell him that his key was at that moment sitting in my fridge setting in Jello?

The next day, I set the beautiful Jello on his desk and awaited his arrival. Krista was sick, but she managed to come in for the shady dealings. Russel got a good laugh, and then his student, Ramzy, proceeded to eat the key out of the Jello.

Chicago Trip

2008-05-19T22:49:00.000-07:00

I've been having a rather difficult time with computers lately. But since I'm at my mom's right now I thought I'd update my blog.

Krista and I had a chance to go to Chicago this last Spring Break. It was a lot of fun. People down south are crazy (and sometimes really rude). I would like to go back to Chicago some time, but the rest of it, they can keep!

This is Krista with her amazing niece, Autumn. She's only shy of 8 months in this picture. She's such an awesome baby. We would have totally kidnapped her if we could have gotten by Krista's mother.

The architecture in Chicago was quite amazing. I now understand how tourist can just stand in the middle of the street and look around. The buildings are so tall that they pretty much blot out the sun. There were a couple of spots that I swear I've seen on "Due South." I think it's pretty cool that I've walked where Benton Fraiser did!

We went to the House of Sell-outs...oops, I mean Blues. I was on "a mission from gawd" to get my husband a Blues Brothers hat. I did him one better. I not only got him a hat, but a shirt and a hamonica (aw... what we do for the men we love). I also had a very beautiful and yummy desert of banana bread pudding.

It was a great time. Krista and I discovered that conceirges rule! On the way back, we figured that the airport security people had probably the most thankless jobs, especially at 5 o'clock in the morning. So instead of being the Blues Brothers, we decided to be the Joy Sisters and get a smile or two. And what do you know, we were successful.

A Little Bizarreness

2008-02-23T18:42:00.000-08:00

Alright, so I haven't been keeping up... but nobody else has either! Actually, I've really been waiting for some pics, but they're not going to come.

As some of you may remember, I had an Iguana at home who...well, let's just say she had some issues. Well, Khisanth the Iguana sadly died. She never really domesticated and she was a hazard in my home, especially with the prospect of having a baby. Don't get me wrong, I didn't kill her. I actually did what I could to keep her alive, but she finally went to be with the great dragons in... Valhalla. Yes, I said "Valhalla."

In order to keep the spirit of Khisanth from haunting me, it became necessary to bury her with honors. However, this was during the extreme cold snap when everything was frozen, especially the ground. How did we handle this problem? Well, why not have a Viking funeral? I built a pretty boat/box; waxed the bottom so it wouldn't get too waterlogged; and took a lighter and some fuel. Krista, Ramzy (a student), and Zatara were the funeral procession as we walked all the way down to the beach in front of my parents house... None of our cars were working. It was a long walk, but perfectly worth it. We poured the lighter fluid, said some words of departure, and set it aflame. It was beautiful. I can't believe that it worked. The boat did sail back in a couple of times, but we pushed it back out to sea. We stayed until it burned all the way down and then made the long trek back home. Krista said it was the coolest thing she had ever down. It was glorious.

Khisanth: Rest in peace, my Viking Dragon.

The Real Puppy

2008-01-24T20:15:00.000-08:00

OKAY!... So here's the REAL picture of my puppy. Awww.... isn't she cute? You can tell by the bits of distruction around her that she's a bit of a handful, but we love her dearly. It's like having a baby in the house, which is exactly what we needed.

Zatarah couldn't be more of a blessing. We got her on January 12, the day before Azalea's delivery date. I have to admit, I was REALLY struggling that week. But, God is gracious, and I'm grateful for our furry little dooger.

There are times when I get really mad at her, but then I see her and her daddy and... well, just look...

How can you stay mad at someone who makes the love of your life so happy? It's funny how whenever Zatara gets in trouble with one of us, she'll go to the other parent. Aw... parenthood. We're having a great time. :)

It's Zatara

2008-01-23T19:17:00.000-08:00

Look at my cute little puppy! ... Okay, okay, so she's a little deformed. She's only been hit by a couple of cars. Yes, she scares small children, but that can be a good thing... right?

Hmm... I can't seem to get the other pictures to load, so I will have to do that at another time.
See ya!

Out of touch...

2008-01-09T10:44:00.000-08:00

Alrighty then...

So I haven't been keeping up on my blog. But I've been reluctant to just rant and rave about how awful I've been feeling and how I have really low moments when I just hate everyone. No, that never makes for a good read. But things are looking up!

We're having a new addition to the family! No, sadly, not another baby just yet. We're working up to that. Thank God for Krista Kegel! We've both been working out. Her insentive is to have hot arms when we go down to Chicago over spring break and my insentive is to be one sexy momma (a baby making machine). MAN! I've really changed since 2006! Anyway, after flipping 2007 the proverbial "bird" I'm looking forward to bigger and better things. Where was I... OH YEAH!

WE GETTING A PUPPY!
Rick and I have long talked about his longing to get a dog. That stipulation was that we needed to be financially sound. Well, Rick is working full time at Alaska Airlines, and things are going really well. It's been awhile since we've had a steady, duel income. I'm loving it! Rick saw on the KGB website that there was a young puppy up for adoption. We vaguely talked about it and I kind of hinted that I would be fine with a dog now. Yesterday I tried sneaking down to the animal shelter to take a look at her and possibly surprise my husband with a new love. However, I got there at 4, which is when they closed. I was rather disappointed. Rick would have loved the surprise. Later, at home, I explained to Rick my intent and my disappointment. During the course of the conversation about the dog, Rick said, "You know, I'm pretty sure she wasn't even at the shelter. I'm pretty sure she's at the vet." That sneaky-sneak had already gotten her! HE was going to surprise ME! *Sigh*... aw, love is a wonderful thing. Anyway, we get to pick her up on Saturday. We're both really excited. I'll take pictures and fill you in later.
:)

Plans for the future

2007-10-17T14:07:00.000-07:00

Here's what Mrs. Tiffany has planned for the next year. However, we'll see how that goes, seeing as how God usually has other plans for us. His plans are always the best way to go, but here's my guidelines so far.
We're going to build a beautiful Azalea courtyard out on the side of our house. I've already drawn up an outline of what it's going to look like. Now the trick is putting it into action. Winter's approaching very quickly and there isn't going to be very much that we can do now. I have the very unrealistic goal of getting this courtyard built within a year. That's just because in a year Rick and I can start trying for kids again. Right now, we're getting things plotted out.
For those in the Seattle area, we'll most likely be hitting you up for ideas on where we can get flagstone, building supplies, and eventually really gorgeous azaleas. We'll be in touch *wink*.

Things are going okay here for the time being. I'm back to teaching at school. It keeps me busy and some days are better than others. Rick applied for the ramp agent job at Alaska Airlines and once he passes training, he'll be officially hired. I'm very proud of him. The pain of missing Azalea is getting easier to deal with as time goes on. I'm finding that I can only function normally when I'm treated normally. It's been a bit tough going to church and immediately having five different people come up and give you sympathetic hugs. I know they mean well, but it's just a painful reminder of why they're giving me that hug. As people start focusing on it less, it gets easier to deal with. It's not like I'm ever going to forget what happened. I'm extremely thankful for people like the new teacher, Krista, whom I see on a regular basis and treats me the same as before the labor. It just helps remind me that I'm still the same person I was before, I just feel like I've aged a hundred years.
Anyway, we still appreciate prayers and love from our spiritual family. We love you all.

A Tribute to Azalea

2007-09-23T17:19:00.000-07:00

This blog is not intended to make anyone sad, but to share the glory and the blessings that God has extended to our family. He is a great God, and He is in control. "All things work together for the good of those who love Him."

For the interest of those who may not know, I just want to share a bit about my little girl. She didn't have a long time on this earth, but she sure made an impact with the little time that she had. I just praise the Lord that she is now in Heaven with our other loved ones; and she will be there waiting for us. Heaven is just going to be that much more awesome. :)

Azalea was born on September 19th, International "Talk like a pirate day." Definately my daughter. I'm so proud of her.

She loved prayer. During any prayer meeting that I attended, I could feel Azalea squirming around and getting all excited.

Even though she may not have been aware of it, Azalea did a lot of things that some people never get to in their entire lifetimes. She's been to Colorado. She's been hot air ballooning. She's been to the Portland Zoo. She saw the vineyards of Dundee, Oregon. She's been to the Emergency room a number of times this year (not really prized moments, but she can chock those up to experience).

Azalea was so beautifully, and wonderfully formed. The doctors warned me that because she was so early, she probably wouldn't have any hair. Boy, were they ever mistaken. She had a full head of hair. It was like a fur pelt! She had eyebrows and beautiful eyelashes. She was so lovely. I was pleased to see that she had my mouth and Rick's nose and chin. Yes, she did have those chubby Native cheeks. She had such long, slender piano fingers; and every single digit had a fingernail. She had such long feet. I refer to them as "swimmer feet" and she used them to kick me quite a bit. I loved every moment of it (she wasn't big enough to really hurt yet).

Rick has commented that maybe it's a good thing the Lord is taking care of her now, because he would have been in trouble. He was hers as soon as he saw her. Isn't that usually the way with little girls? They have that magic power to wrap Daddy around her little finger.

I miss my Azalea, and I always will. However, I am so blessed with a peace that can only come from the Lord. Everything progressed so quickly and there was no way to even know what was going to happen. But the Lord is faithful, and I know, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that He has a plan. We're just part of a bigger picture. Therefore, I praise the Lord and thank Him for giving me my little girl. My heart rejoices, for I'm now a mother. Rick is a father. My parents are now grandparents. And Rick's parents are grandparents again. Azalea's name means, "Reserved by God." We didn't know that at the time, but now it serves as a confirmation that God has a plan. Praise be to the Father who prepares us and equips us for all the challenges we receive. I am so blessed for the peace that I have, and the awesome daughter that God has given us.

Thank you all for your prayers.

Unwelcome Visitor, part 2

2007-08-20T19:41:00.000-07:00

Here's the pictures of our little Dracula, as promised. (Oh, on a side note, my dad is sending out emails that he has a grandson on the way. Just to clear that up, we're not exactly sure what we're having, so, it's mostly just wishful thinking at this point.)

There's the little menace. He's all of about 4" total. Still creepy as all get out.

Yes, that's little dot on the top of the door is the bat and that's Rick laying on the floor, covering his head and trying to encourage the winged terror out the door. This may look rediculous, but trust me, I look 100 times more silly with a blanket wrapped around my head, cowering behind the office door, screaming and taking a picture. :)

My hero! That mighty bat hunter! (Rick was very reluctant to let me take this pic. I think he's cute. Guess that's why I married him).

Unwelcome visitor

2007-08-13T15:36:00.000-07:00

Okay, so now that I'm back to blogging, my home computer has something wrong with it that doesn't allow me to sign into anything. If anyone has an suggestions, I'd really appreciate it.

My story takes place probably about two weeks ago. It was during that spell of 80 degree weather we were having. We kept the sliding glass door open, trying to cool things down a bit. One night we came home kind of late (the door was closed) and sat down to relax with a movie. It was calm and peaceful. Suddenly, out from the corners of darkness, on wings of terror, swoops our invader. At first I thought, "Oh no! We bird flew into our house! The cats are going to get it." But, oh no. It wasn't some poor, defenseless, cute bird. It was a bat. Normally, I don't consider myself squimish when it comes to small terrorizers such as spiders, bugs, and mice. But I've found that bats CREEP ME OUT! This thing started flitting about our living room and Rick and I immediately hit the deck. It was a rather rediculous sight. I managed to grab a blanket and wrapped it about my head. It's amazing how much movies can affect your perception on real life scenarios. As soon as we saw that bat, we were both thinking: RABIES!!! It's going to get caught in our hair! We frantically tried to figure out what we were going to do. After calling a number of people and no one answering (like I said, it was late), I discovered that the office was safe. So I immediately shut myself in there and left Rick to deal with the bat (in my defense, let me just say that I'm the one to deal with the mice and spiders in the house). Being the ever helpful wife, I jumped online and looked up "how to get a bat out of the house." It's amazing the things you can learn in a crisis. Did you know that only 1 in 1000 bats carries rabies? However, they said that rabies is a big enough risk to just stay away from bats. I was going to brave it and try and throw a towel on that sucker and throw it outside... but I'm pregnant now. I'll let Rick be the man of the house and rescue us.
Eventually, it came to pass that all the doors and windows were opened and all the lights turned out. Our cat, Cid, took a couple of valiant leaps (5 ft. in the air) to try and cat the fiend. He clipped it one time, but it didn't stop the bug-muncher. After that, Cid lost interest and went outside. Isis, our disgrace to the feline species as far as hunting goes, did a good job of tracking the bat. She would follow it intently and her jingle collar would let Rick know in the dark where it was. At one point, Rick was crawling on the floor, thinking it was safe. Isis was near by focusing on something on the floor. Rick shined his light over to reveal that the bat was crawling on the floor next to him.
After three hours of buzzes to the head, jump starts, paniced runs and screams, the bat eventually flew out on its own. From now on, we only open windows that have a screen and close everything before dusk.
I'll get pictures posted as soone as I can. :)

Baby Pickle!

2007-07-19T07:40:00.000-07:00

Sorry! I know... I haven't been updating my blog at all. Life just got really busy. Yeah yeah, when does it not? But, this is an exciting blog to be updating on! I finally scanned baby Pickle's first picture (no, that is not the kid's real name. We just call it that instead of "it").

We did have a bit of a scare when we got back from my brother's wedding in Colorado. I had experienced some bleeding and was afraid I was having a miscarriage. However, when we went to the ER, they did and ultrasound and found a VERY active baby who did not look ready to leave yet. It was pretty cute. The doctor was talking to it, saying, "What are you doing in there? Playing tennis? Your mom was just worried about you, so settle down." The following day, the OB doctor, Dr. Archer just assured me that this was only the first time that this kid was going to scare the heck out of me.

We have another OB appointment this morning and we pray everything is in order. I will try and keep everyone updated. :)

Isis the painter

2006-12-30T17:56:00.000-08:00

The other night I was painting the bathroom (approx. 2:00 AM... I just kind of get going) and my cat Isis decided to come see what I was up to. She's still getting used to having a new house, and I think she misses the company of her 15 lb. compadre' Sammy. Since Mama was at the other end of the house, she decided to come check things out. She got so excited, that she decided to even help me paint... with her face.

She looks good in Linda Loma green, doesn't she? She's cleaned herself up for the most part, but there's still traces of it in her ear. I'm so lucky to have such a good helper.

Home Owners

2006-12-29T20:53:00.000-08:00

Finally! I've been having some difficulty getting onto this site to update our blog, let's see if I can get it to work now.
As many of you know, Rick and I have transitioned over to the realm of home owners! Yes! It really is a great feeling. We bought Veta Mutart's place and are loving it. It was a very quick process, seeing as how Veta needed to get down to Kansas very quickly because of her son's impending deployment back to Iraq. We already miss her very much and continue to lift her up in our prayers.
Already we've been making renovations to the place. It feels like it's been years, but it's really only been a matter of 3 weeks. All the painting and most of the carpeting have been done in the two weeks that I've had for Christmas Break. It's been rather exhausting, but very rewarding. Here's before and after pictures of the office. I'm really glad at how it turned out.
There's tons more to show, but I don't know how to use this blog well enough to show you everything, so people are just going to have to come over! (Guess I'll have to working on getting my house clean, huh?)

Beware!

2006-11-28T17:31:00.000-08:00

You know, a lot of times the enemy wants to come in and steal our joy. Kind of like how bears always want to steal your bike. But as Christians, we need to be on our guard. Whenever the day starts out going really crummy, before getting mad, take a deep breath, pray, and remember that Satan wants you to have a bad day. Don't let him have it. Smile, and give the devil a swift kick to the rump, because the joy of the Lord is your strength. Also, don't use honey as an anti-theft device on your bicycle.

Pray... PLEASE!!!

2006-10-14T22:35:00.000-07:00

As some of you may already know, we've been trying for sometime to get Rick's wisdom teeth removed. There have been various mishaps with difficult planning, because of Rick's ferry job and with miscommunication. It was beginning to look like some force didn't want Rick to have his mandibles of knowledge removed. Now I know why...
This really stinks! Rick looks like he's in unbearable pain and I don't know what to do about it! When I had my wisdom teeth removed, I don't remember it being this bad, granted it was 5 years ago. I feel terrible, because there's nothing that I can do and he gets mad; not necessarily at me, but he gets mad. This must be what nurses have to deal with on a regular basis. Man! You nurses out there REALLY have my respect. So, if anyone is reading this recently, please please please pray for my hubby. Pray that the pain goes away and he has a very quick recovery. (And maybe offer a little prayer that I don't have a crying fit). THANKS!

Miss Frizzle or Miss Viola Swamp?

2006-09-23T00:26:00.000-07:00

Today I received some rather distressing news. A friend of mine had apparently talked to one of my students very recently and was told that I was a "strict, mean teacher who didn't discipline students who interrupt and I assigned too much homework."

....

Am I really that terrible? Granted, this is coming from a 10 year old who cannot seem to keep his or her finger out of his or her own nose. But still, I can't help but feel a tinge of hurt in hearing these words.

Ever since I was called to be a teacher, I've always wanted to be like Miss Frizzle from The Magic School Bus. She was the cool teacher who dressed funny, had a lizard, and took kids on great field trips. Hands on learning, all the way! But have I instead turned into a Miss Viola Swamp from Miss Nelson is Missing? Was my Miss Nelson (my good, sweet teaching side) too weak to control my classroom, so I had to pull out the meaness of my own "Miss Swamp?" I hate this feeling. I'm not ready to accept being "the mean teacher." It's great to be "the cool teacher" because everybody is excited to see you. However, my class isn't mature enough to do all the really cool stuff yet. It's really too bad.

I guess I don't really know where I'm going with this. I tend to blog more when Rick isn't home, because I have no one else to talk to. Does the fact that I base my life philosophy on children's picture books make me crazy? Who knows? I'm not really going to change the way that I teach, but it doesn't make the hurt go away. So,... if I start wearing all black all the time, stop brushing my hair, and paint my face white--Just look out!

God Bless our Law Enforcement

2006-09-21T23:31:00.000-07:00

God Bless all of you men and women who are out there enforcing the law and keeping us safe. I don't think you get this enough, so here's my contribution:

THANK YOU!!!

Glutton for punishment?

2006-09-19T17:57:00.000-07:00

This is what I want to be like. Cute and really buff! HA! (That'll be the day).
Some of you can probably relate. Our lives are running at a comfortable pace; everythings fine, but perhaps we get a little bored once in awhile. So to keep us busy, we take up a project. Things start getting a bit more complex, but it's okay. We still have a little time. We can fit in one more thing. Then, all at once, our lives are super busy and someone asks us to do them a favor by helping them out. AAAAAHHHHHH!!!! What have we done?! We've just volunteered our lives away!
....But hey,... at least we're not bored.
If this is you, please know that you have a someone who can sympathize with you here (I'm talking about Tiffany, Rick... I'm not so sure about). The important thing that I need to remember is that even though life gets really busy, I need to keep that time with God sacred. No cutting corners. That's the only way that I'm going to survive this. Also, making time for family and realizing that they are on my side. I tend to forget that, in my maniacal business.
Having spilled my ramblings onto the internet, I am now off to class, then to call a parent, and then to reading a book, and then to bed (yes, that is my night, lame as it is). Farewell!

Rick's Lament

2006-09-16T00:11:00.000-07:00

Rick has recently said to me, "I don't really care for blogging." The he quickly added, "but it's okay for you." Now what am I to say to this? Do I simply stop, because my husband is being a jerk about it (aka, being a butt). Or do I simply snub my nose at him and continue as though it doesn't bother me? Personally, I enjoy keeping in touch with everyone and enjoy writing down my random thoughts so that anyone who might be remotely interested in my ramblings can know what's up. So right now, I respectfully stick out my tongue and blow a raspberry at the love of my life. The I post my blog because that's how I "roll."

Still alive and kicking

2006-09-10T00:58:00.000-07:00

Yeah, we're still here, just a lot going on. Between switching computers, house hunting, and school starting all over again, there just hasn't been enough time for blogging. Not that it really matters. I'm still trying to figure out how to get pictures and COOL STUFF on here (LIKE EVERYBODY ELSE) *that was meant to be said with a jealous sneer, add your own sound effects.*
School is well underway and I'm just barely going with it. I knew this was going to happen to me. Last year I started out with a small class of three students and they were perfect! I actually had to encourage them to talk in class. Some people would say, "Oh, but it's great that you get to start out with such a small class." WRONG!!! I was good and ready for a class of up to 25 kids when I graduated college. However, last year (even though it was TONS of fun) my classroom management atrophied (see, I'm smart. I use big words). So now here I am starting all over again. Ain't that a peach?
BUT... I'm not here to complain. I actually need to turn it all back to God and say, "Thank you." Thank you Lord for challenging me in so many ways. There's a saying (I got it from Conan the Barbarian) that says, "That which doesn't kill you makes you stronger." That's how I feel somedays. But I'm doing a job that I love; working with fantastic people (our last staff party was an absolute riot); and making a impact in the spiritual lives of children. What could be better than that?
Rick is still on the ferry, but there's no telling how much longer that will be for. We've been praying continually that he will be able to stay on through the winter. Time is running out and we can't help but feel a little nervous. I have absolute faith that God will always provide us with exactly what we need. I also know that sometimes He stretches us pretty thin. So,... prayer is ALWAYS gladly accepted.
Having blathered my peace, I'm going to go to bed and try to sleep off this cold that's trying to come on board. Blessed be His name! (even when we travel through the wilderness).

A very lucky night for Pirates

2006-07-13T11:55:00.000-07:00

Last Friday, Pirates of the Carribean II came out in theatres. Surprisingly enough, it was also coming out here in Ketchikan. In case you didn't already know it, my husband and I are avid pirate fans (I know, I can hear the shock in your voice), so going to see this movie was an absolute must. But not only did we need to go see it, we needed to go in "style." There's nothing I love more than dressing up, whether it's formal or goofy. Well, what I neglected to remember was that Maria's bridal shower was that same night. The shower was before the show, but I knew I wouldn't have time to go home and change and then make it to the theatre. Wanting to support Maria in her upcoming nuptials, but also wanting to have the evening I had promised myself, I went to the bridal shower in full "Red Rose Robert's the lady pirate" get-up. Boy, talk about turning heads, but I was surprised at how OK everyone seemed to be with it. Most of the older ladies just chocked it up to "young 'uns having fun."
So at about an hour before the movie started, my "Dread Pirate Roberts (AKA Rick) shows up in our black Acura dragon and sweeps me speedily to the theatre. When we got there, there was already a line a block long. I quickly jumped into line while Rick went and parked the car. Once again, lots of turned heads, but I'm sure they were just wishing that they had the guts to do the same (well, that's what I tell myself anyway). While in line, I made the tragic discovery that this line was all of people who had pre-paid tickets. What the dread pirate and I neglected to get...were tickets. So everyone was telling us, "Oh, you're not going to get in. The show's completely sold out." Talk about all dressed up and no where to go.
When Rick showed up, I told him what was going on. We decided to go ahead and hang out and just see what happened. Fortunately, we didn't have to wait long. The lady that was in front of us was with 3 teenage girls and I over heard them talking about selling their tickets. I asked them if they had tickets they didn't intend to use and they answered that they had 4 people but only 2 tickets. Well! Rick and I were two people with no tickets! I offered to buy the tickets off her for $10 a piece(which amounts to about the same I would have paid the theatre anyway). They made a hasty retreat, and at the time, I didn't think about it. The guy in front of us was kind of suspicious and told us to take a close look at those tickets. One of my brother's friends then pointed out that one of the tickets was a child's ticket. We'd been ripped off! I wasn't so worried about the money, except that I knew they wouldn't let us both into the theatre with that ticket.
The lady who runs the theatre then came out to the line and shouted, "The movie is sold out! If you don't have a ticket, you might as well go home because you're not getting in!" We called her over and showed her our tickets and asked if we could just pay the difference and upgrade it to an adult ticket. She gruffly sighed, rolled her eyes, and said, "I'll have to think about it, but you got ripped off." I'm not quite sure why it was such a big deal. I mean, isn't a butt in a seat a butt in a seat, regardless of if it's a child's or not? So while Rick and I stood in line with much anticipation, my brother Sean comes up and says, "Hey Tiff. You left the lights on in your car." Oops. Well my stud of a husband runs down the street in his piratey attire to go save "The Dragon." The suspicious man ahead of us turns around and chuckles, "Man, you guys just aren't having much luck tonight." Rick's gone for a long time, and the line starts moving. What if he doesn't come back in time? There's still the problem with the second ticket. Do I just take the one good one and leave him out with the car? Oooo, bad pirate thoughts! No, here he comes again, running as only Rick can. As we get up to the door, the lady looks at us, and very sympathetically says, "We won't worry about it. I'll just let you guys in." Hurray! We thanked her profusely and made our way in. I think she felt sorry for us because we got "ripped off." Hey, I'll take it anyway I can get it.
Now, Rick and I were pretty far back in the line, almost some of the last people. You would think that there wouldn't be any good seats left. Not true. We got some of the best seats in the house. Towards the back of the theatre I spotted two empty seats right in the center. They were open because on either side of them were two rather big guys. Who wants to crawl over scary-looking big guys just to get a theatre seat? Well, Red Rose Roberts would! Actually, both of the guys were good friends of ours; which worked out really well, because I hate yelling and having a good time when I'm surrounded by people I don't know.
The show was awesome! If you're a PotC fan, this movie is a must see. Warning, it is a little bit more gruesome than the first, so preview it before letting your kids see it. I just keep thinking about what the suspicious man said to me: "Man, you guys just aren't having much luck tonight." We got into a completely sold out show when we didn't have tickets; we were informed about our car before the battery died; we got really good seats in a croweded theatre; and got to enjoy a good movie with friends. I'd say we had pretty "lucky" evening. Praise be to God from whom ALL blessings flow!

Working out

2006-06-29T06:49:00.000-07:00

You know, the funny thing about work out videos... they don't do you any good unless you actually do them. And it isn't enough to just sit and watch them either. You actually have to get up off the couch and jump around like a monkey on crack.
I have a substantial collection of various workout videos all the way from Tae Bo to Belly Dancing aerobics. All of them promise to be fun and get you to body type that you want, but it just doesn't seem to be enough. My most recent acquisition is the walking aerobics.
Yeah, I know what you're thinking. A Walking Video??? Why don't just go outside and enjoy the real thing. I thought the exact same thing. However, it wasn't until I actually tried the videos that I changed my mind, big time. It's a nice workout and incorporates all of the muscles and gets them in motion. Plus, its low impact, for real. No jumping around (easy on the joints and...uh, chest).
The biggest thing that struck me though is that the lady who leads the workout is a Christian, and she contiually talks about how God created our bodies to move. It made me realize that our bodies are supposed to be temples to God, so we're supposed to take good care of them. For years I've been trying to lose weight for all kinds of reasons: for attraction, guys, my own self-esteem, but nothing has worked. However, now I'm faaaaaaar more accountable now. It's not really my own body. I'm just using it for the time being, so I need to take care of what belongs to God, right? So anyway, I'd appreciate prayer that I can finally get rid of this weight and be what God intended me to be.

One year under the ol' belt

2006-06-27T12:12:00.000-07:00

Well, as of the 9th of June I have officially completed my first year of teaching. And I have to say, it was an absolute blast! The kids were wonderful and we were able to have tons of fun (granted, I only had 3 students but we still kicked it none the less).
This summer I was looking forward to taking it easy. Rick is now working on the Ferry System (thank you Jesus) and he's bringing home the bacon, so to speak. So, having passed off the bread-winning duties to my husband I was looking forward to doing some gardening, getting my house in order, and tying up all my loose ends... No such luck.
I have a new found respect for all school secretaries. I am definately NOT cut out for the job. I'm filling in until they hire somebody permanent. I AM goin back to teaching! I've only had about 3 hours worth of training by someone who had just had her wisdom teeth removed and was doped up of IBprofen. I know absolutely nothing about accounting (I'm lucky to make 2+2= 4). Everthing is on Quickbooks and I'm afraid to do anything because one thing effects it all!
I'm also heading up the 4th of July booths this year. It was only supposed to be the beanbag booth, but through various circumstances I have to help out with the food booth too. I need to learn to stop volunteering. Actually, I should rejoice that God is keeping me so busy. This way I'm active and socializing when I'd probably just be sitting inside playing videogames until my brains leaked out my ear (there's a picture for you).