Cat's out of the bag...

Alright... for those of you who may not already know... I'm going to have another baby! Rick and I are beyond excited. It actually is an incredible testimony. Allow me to share.
Last year after Azalea was born, our OB doctor recommended that we wait a year before trying again for a baby. This was absolute agony, as I knew that I had had a baby, but my house was eerily quiet. I like to think that we've hadled ourselves well, considering the hurt and dissapointment. Sure, there were some days when it was hard just to get out of bed, but we still did what needed to be done. As June came around, my pills ran out and I just decided not to get any more. I figured it was close enough to a year. And I have to say, I was expecting to put a bun in the oven right away, since that was what happened last time.
Well, God being who he is didn't want it to be that simple. This was a special event. I developed some physical problems that made getting pregnant difficult. And in the inbetween times I was burning through pregnancy tests like crazy (and they are not inexpensive). It was a difficult time for me emotionally, because I wanted this so badly and every negative test was a stab to the heart. However, it says in God's Word that our Spirits prayers louder and more effectively than our own words ever could. And he knew that on a daily basis my heart cried out bitterly for a baby.
Earlier this summer, we had a man come from Honduras by the name of Felicito Nunez (I think that was his last name). He spoke powerfully, and was full of the Spirit. He really convicted me. He had said that he had the privelege to be at all of the prayer meetings in the church, but then he asked, "Do you not have any young people here? Are there only grey-heads in this church?" Boy, that struck me hard. I had been neglecting going to Friday night prayer because of my own excuses. And the enemy was using Azalea as a big weapon against me. I knew it was always a battle to get to prayer, but until then, I hadn't realized that the enemy was wiping the floor with me. So, Rick and I said, "Enough is enough!" and got back to praying. While Felicito was speaking that night, I felt a stirring in my Spirit and I knew I needed to go up and pray about this baby situation. Moments later, I felt Krista's hand on my shoulder and she whispered, "I just really feel that if he gives an altar call, you need to go up and we'll pray for healing with this baby stuff." I immediatly started crying, I mean, is God obvious or what? Felicito did give a call, but it was so different that what we were used to. And silly me, I let fear keep me in my seat. I didn't go up. I knew I needed to, but I stayed glue to me seat. The worship team was called up to play for communion, and the whole time I was bawling my eyes out because I knew I didn't do what I was supposed to. When the service was over, I asked Rick if we should go pray. He wasn't quite aware of what was up, but he said, "Let's go to the prayer room." That wasn't quite what I knew I had to do, but it was a start. As we made our way towards the prayer room, all of a sudden, there was Felicito, almost as if God had cleared him for us. I immediately went over to him and told him that I needed prayer. Very friendly like he said, "Okay. I will pray for you." It was amazing! I didn't even tell him what I needed prayer for... he just knew it. He prayed for a family for Rick and I. He prayed that we would have it in GOD'S TIMING. And then he told us that God was indeed going to give us a family. That we were going to be rewarded with children.
As if being prophecied over wasn't enough, there's more. The same weedend as Rick's and my anniversary, there was a women's retreat with Margie Rose. It was wonderful. A real moving of the Spirit. On the first night, when we had ended, Chrissie McClennan closed by saying that if we need prayer that we should go up and pray, and not leave here without taking care of matters with the Lord. I knew that I should go and pray, because I was frustrated with not yet being pregnant, and what better person to pray with me than a sister in Christ? Well, at the same table I was sitting at, two women starting talking about babies. It was simple, and innocent, and I wasn't even part of the conversation; but I let Satan tweek the hurt in my heart and I left without praying. I used the hurt as an excuse to keep me from doing what I was supposed to do. It was a Friday, so I later went to prayer and I tried to push it out of my mind. It was not big deal, tomorrow I'd do the right thing, it doesn't matter. Well, at prayer, Rosie Walker started praying for the women who passed up the oppotunity to pray. Oh man,... Rosie was telling on me without even knowing it! Actually, it was the Spirit through Rosie that was telling me I needed to get right. So then I prayed, asking for forgiveness, but it exploded into something more. I realized then and there how big of a weapon the enemy had against me, and I needed to give all the pain over to God. I didn't want to be manipulated by my hurt anymore. Then everyone there gathered around and put there hands on me, and Rosie prayed a beautiful prayer over me. She was the sister in Christ I needed to pray with. David Michael was there as well. He is an Indian man from Australia, who pastors a church in Melbourne. He also prayed over me, not knowing my exact situation. But he encouraged me to pray as Hannah prayed--crying out to God for a child that she would give right back to him. I did, and me heart was healed so much that night. David also told me to study Samuel I, and get the promises from God that were written there. I couldn't help realizing that Hannah's praise was exactly the kind of thing that I would sing too. This was Friday night.
The very next day, I felt compelled to take yet another pregnancy test. Seems very close, and I was going to wait... but I felt I had to. Wouldn't you know, it was positive. I didn't want to be premature with my news... but I knew in my heart that this was my promised child (or children, we joke). Part of me wanted to wait until I was further along, but how could I keep something so wonderful a secret? And I would have been keeping it secret out of fear, which would have been the same thing as worshipping the thing I didn't want to come to pass. We told my parents and everyone that was at prayer on Friday. It was David's last day with us, and he was so excited. He started crying and telling us how much we had blessed him.
We were going to keep in underwraps for a bit longer, but on Paul's final night here of preaching, there was just such a strong moving of the Spirit. And as they asked for testimonies of the wonderful things that God has done, I KNEW I had to speak.
So here I am now. And enormous sorrow has been lifted from my heart. I look expectantly to what God brings us. For all who read this, please please please pray for us. Pray that our baby, or babies, is born healthy, and on time. I'm enjoying my morning sickness, and my fatigue. Know I know that it all will be worth it. PRAISE GOD for His infinite blessings!!!